Not Good Enough For Goodwill?

A sea of thrifty clothing I’ve been donating a lot of stuff to Goodwill and have discovered they can be pretty picky sometimes.

A few years ago, we brought a U-Haul worth of old furniture (Eric’s old stuff) to Goodwill and the manager came out to sort through it. She took most of the things but the biggest items (two large black couches) got rejected because they had some white cat hair on them.

We laughed about it for days, saying that our couches were so lousy that even Goodwill didn’t want them. I hadn’t considered that something as simple as cat hair would disqualify them from being donated. Unfortunately, those poor hairy (but still useable) couches ended up at the curb on trash day. We figured if Goodwill didn’t want them that no one would.

After another unexpected rejection I started to wonder why these perfectly useable things weren’t good enough. By talking to my friend who used to work at Goodwill, I learned that many people, including myself, have misconceptions about what Goodwill really does. I assumed Goodwill resold donated items at very low prices to help people who need to make their paycheck really stretch. That isn’t their true mission, though.

Goodwill sells the donated items to help raise revenue so they can offer employment opportunities and workforce training. Their focus is on getting people back into the workforce, not necessarily providing low cost goods to lower income families.

If you’ve ever been in a Goodwill store you may have noticed that the prices weren’t at rock bottom levels. The prices are a little higher than what you might think a thrift store would have. My friend said it seemed that middle class shoppers looking for good deals were their primary customers instead of low income families like you might expect.

So, now it makes sense. Goodwill doesn’t want everything you have to donate; only the items that they can resell at decent prices without additional work. The items need to be in good sellable condition when you drop them off. That way they can get the highest price for that item and raise the most funds for their employment programs. I think the work they do is wonderful and now that I know what they are looking for I’ll make sure to screen my donations more carefully.

OK, now I know why Goodwill deemed my hairy couches unworthy but I hate having to throw out useable items I no longer want because they aren’t in top condition. For example, two perfectly good but scratched up end tables or a stained coffee machine. They may be ugly, but they are still functional and could help out someone in need.

They don’t belong in the trash just because I no longer need them and they aren’t in sellable condition. I’m sure that there are plenty of people that would be willing to take in a scratched end table. Maybe someone who doesn’t have the money to spend on end tables might have the time to refinish them. I need to find a way to reach those people.

Wouldn’t it be nice if there was a place where even slightly damaged (but fully functional) things could be given to people who need them? I’m sure there are lots of families that could have benefited from having those black couches, even if they had some cat hair on them.

My friend suggested that next time, before trashing the rejected items, I try contacting other organizations that could use them, like:

Homeless shelters

Women’s shelters

Rehabilitation centers

Thrift stores

Furniture can be especially helpful in shelters where they provide transitional housing for people getting back on their feet. My friend mentioned that she donated several pieces to our local shelter that provides temporary housing for abused women. What a wonderful way to give that old furniture a second life.

If donation isn’t an option there is always freecycle. Someone is bound to want your extra stuff and this way it doesn’t hit the landfill before it is completely used up. Everybody wins!

What do you do with the things you want to donate or give away but don’t have the time to fix up? Please share your ideas!

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Embarrassed By Your Accomplishments?

THAT’S your new house?? I find myself in a strange dilemma these days. I often get asked how I like the new house and to tell them all about it. I consider getting the new home to be a huge accomplishment for us. It took effort, sacrifice, and hard work to manage to “move up”.

But with many significant accomplishments – like getting a nice home, a hefty promotion at work, or an upscale item – you have to figure out how to handle it gracefully with others.

How do you remain humble about your accomplishments without others thinking you are dissatisfied, embarrassed, or even rude?

Here are two scenarios I have encountered recently:

Does she even like the house?

I’m a humble person by nature. I just don’t want to “toot my own horn” around others. When people ask me about the house I usually reply that I really like it and that it works well for us. Recently, some friends thought my lack of exuberance on the subject meant that I must be unhappy with it for some reason. They asked Eric if I even liked the home. They couldn’t have been more wrong.

I absolutely love my new home. It’s perfect. I simply feel uncomfortable gushing on and on about how awesome my new house is to other people. I feel like its bragging.

I suppose they were looking forward to me telling them all about my house and were disappointed when I spoke in general terms and not of specifics. If someone asks me questions about the home (how big is it, what kind of countertops, etc) I’m happy to answer them but I’m not inclined to spend a lot of time talking about all the upgrades without being prompted. It feels like showing off to me.

Nobody likes that guy at the party who talks about how cool his brand new yacht is and how it has the best of everything. I don’t really want to listen to that guy and I certainly don’t want to become that guy. I feel a discreet reply is the appropriate way to show my happiness with the home without shoving my accomplishment in everyone’s faces.

When can we come over?

Our last house was in a modest neighborhood and we have a friendly relationship with one of our neighbors there. We talk and help each other out but we never have dinner together or anything like that. You can say that we’re cordial but not close.

When we run into them while at the old house they say that they want to come see the new home. We say we will invite them when we are more settled. Just yesterday, I got a phone call from her saying she was driving around in our new neighborhood trying to find our home. She wanted to stop by unannounced. Thank goodness I had plans already because I have been avoiding this situation.

The neighbors are wonderful people but I’m reluctant to ask them over. We don’t know them very well so I wonder if they will view us differently or if it could make them feel bad in some way. Let me explain.

When we talked this week she told me that the cable guy had just stopped by their house because they were so late on their payments. She had to write them a check right then to keep service going. She explained how terrible they were with money and how they just never figured it all out. She even said: “I’m 20 years older than you; you would think we would have learned this by now.”

Bringing her to this house, which is considered an upgrade from our old neighborhood, makes me feel immodest and a little insensitive - especially after she told me of their money issues this week. I know we worked hard and sacrificed a lot for our new home, and that their financial problems aren’t my fault, but it still doesn’t make me feel better about the situation.

In the same way that people may hesitate having “rich” friends in their home due to embarrassment or fear of judgment, I’m having the same sort of concerns. I think it goes both ways. To me, it’s kind of like talking about having a fully funded emergency fund to your friends who are living paycheck to paycheck.

I know many people would say that I’m crazy to feel funny in these situations. I should be proud to show off my successes to everyone, right? It isn’t that I’m not proud of how far we have come – I absolutely am. Maybe part of it is because I understand how it can feel being on the other side.

I can admit that I’ve seen my friend’s new Lexus or Sub-Zero fridge and felt that pang of jealousy. Hell, I’ve been jealous of my sister’s gorgeous kitchen for a long time now. Now that I finally have a kitchen I’m proud of, I just can’t help but be humble about it to others.

Have you ever felt embarrassed to talk about an accomplishment to others? How did you deal with it? Leave a comment and let us know!

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